Genesis 3:6, "And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat."
Free will or God's will, the line can easily be blurred when making decisions. Many times in a day I have to ask myself is this God, me or of the enemy. It is not always easy to determine. It sometimes can mask itself as something other than what God may be asking us to do and there are many ways to discern which may actually be occurring. Eve ate from the tree and Adam from free will chose to follow that same path. Neither stopped to ask one simple question, Is this Gods will and if so, where is the confirmation from God? James 1:5, If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
As in the Garden of Eden scenario we may at times ask this question, but we must be careful in listening for the answer as the enemy can truly find a way in, through this issue. I myself had to look to God a lot during the last few months. Today those stances were brought into question as possible selfishness. In the context of the situation and my background, my stances could very possibly be seen as selfish in nature. However I felt it was important enough to defend my position and notate that had I followed what my history defines me as, I definitely would not be taking a stand of any kind, especially not a Godly conviction such as this one. I also felt troubled, as the other persons decision wasn't questioned as selfishness. So I made a quick prayer to God to defend me and stepped aside as this was the only Godly thing to do in this situation. I have been consistently checked and balanced over the last several months and I believe I am my own worst critic. I question sometimes to a fault what God is asking me to do, and this presents a problem too. That is, I am easily frustrated with God, causing me to question His decisions and my actions. So I am careful to make sure they are of God and not a selfish act. (James 3:17, But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.) Someone pointed out to me today that just the mere fact of me agreeing to this meeting in the environment I did, was an act of selflessness, yet others may look at the meeting itself as selfish in nature.
This dilemma is one that had been debated since recorded history. One of the most known debated free will or Godly act was that of the Crusades of the Dark ages. Pope Urban II and the Catholic church supported the war of trying to take back the Holy lands of Jerusalem from the Muslims. Many will argue that God bestowed the directive to do this and the only reason it failed was the lack of faith among those who were fighting. Yet others would say it was devised of selfish motives by king and clergy as a right of passage to those lands. In truth we all will never know the truth until God can answer that day when we are in front of Him. I referenced this era because I wanted you to see how easily our motives can be perceived as either positive or negative. Matthew 7:1, "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." I am not advocating the idea of us judging other peoples motive, nor them judging us. Simply showing how easy our motives can be called into question.
I believe what happens, especially when there are dramatic changes in people, that everything about them comes into question. Others don't understand you as they could not see your burning bush. For them you are acting out or other forms of attracting attention. They are slow, if ever, to see what God is doing in your life. Just as many mocked David standing in front of Goliath, I stand here asking God for direction and moving when he says too. 1 Peter 3:17 For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil. Others who have been in my shoes understand, yet most doubt me and wait for the old me to emerge. God gives me free will to definitely go back and be the "old me", but most don't understand that I choose never to return to that path. I will follow the path and decisions God has paid before me, no matter where they lead.
Let's Pray: Father God, please forgive us for any selfishness we may have in our lives. Father show us the way you want us to live. Father show others who look at us, our true hearts, so they can see we are truly walking with you Father. For those who do not know you and live by total free will Lord, we ask that you show them grace and Love. Father for those who truly are not convinced of the paths they have chosen, Father help guide them and let them be still, so you may speak and they may hear your will Father. As it says in scripture "Let Your WILL be Done" Father, not ours. Father we thank you for hearing these prayers and praise You fro all that You do in our lives. We ask all of this in Jesus name.....AMEN.
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